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Taylor Lautner

from Caretaker by Total Downer

/

  • Cassette + Digital Album

    Distributed by Just Because Records
    Only 80 copies available
    5 dubbed on old sermon tapes so you'll get some wacky old cleveland ohio preachers, not the cleanest audio tho
    75 clean on red tape

    Includes unlimited streaming of Caretaker via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    ships out within 10 days

      $10 USD or more 

     

  • T-Shirt/Shirt + Digital Album

    Designed by Peter Kratcoski (instagram.com/peterkratcoski)

    Printed on Gildan Heavy Cotton! My personal favorite style shirt-- soft, but boxy and doesn't hug your bod tight! Try wearing it classic like Denise (pictured) or tie-dying it like Nia (pictured), looks so good that way too!

    Includes unlimited streaming of Caretaker via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    ships out within 5 days
    edition of 20 

      $20 USD or more 

     

  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    Purchasable with gift card

      $1 USD  or more

     

  • Buy the Full Digital Album

lyrics

I threw up when I realized what they did to ya
You were just a kid in Breaking Dawn
Then they made you strip to give us what we want

Though I know it’s wrong,
I’m obsessed with getting abs like ya
Chugging protein shakes, exhausting runs
I wanna be as jacked as you were as a child

I just want a safer body!
Blend in with the beefcakes just for the summer
Strut out in a tight white t-shirt
tear it off like Taylor Lautner in Twilight Eclipse
I just want a safer body

Eating just enough to force myself into a starvation
I feel unwell and still my weight is up
I wanna be objectified and fetishized

I just want a safer body!
Blend in with the beefcakes just for the summer
Strut out in a tight white t-shirt
tear it off like Taylor Lautner in Twilight Eclipse
I just want a safer body

I’ll get big enough to beat them up
And we can double team those Hollywood perverts
Pound them to the pavement
Til there’s not a face left
I will never trust another man
I will never trust another man

I just want a safer body!
Blend in with the beefcakes just for the summer
Strut out in a tight white t-shirt, i don’t know
I just want a safer body!
Blend in with the beefcakes just for the summer
tear it off like Taylor Lautner in Twilight Eclipse
I just want a safer body

credits

from Caretaker, released January 27, 2023

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